Children experience a variety of reactions and feelings to a given situation.
It is dependent on their personality and temperament how they experience or perceive their family’s situation. Children can have unresolved feelings of loss when their parents separate. They lose the idea of what they thought their family was going to be, are no longer able to see both parents in their home, and may have fear and anger surrounding incidents of domestic violence, abuse, and so on.
It’s important for children to learn that all of their feelings are valid and okay to feel. It’s normal to experience several feelings at one time.
Children need help identifying their feelings. As with adults, children get stuck when they do not have a place to express their feelings and understand the connection between their thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Rejecting feelings means not wanting to deal with them or ignoring the feelings. People act out unhealthy behaviors when they try to ignore what’s going on inside their bodies. An individual therapist is often the key to help the child have a safe space to work with their feelings.
A Child’s Voice
When parents separate, children may not feel seen or heard. Even in intact families, this is one of the most common complaints from children that we see as therapists. When children don’t feel like anyone understands them, it can cause them to feel:
- Anxious and depressed
- Isolated from the rest of the world
- Like their self-esteem is impacted
- That their feelings and thoughts are not important
Sometimes these feelings can result in behavioral issues and low functioning in school or at home.
Children’s self-esteem can deteriorate if they go for long periods with unresolved feelings of not being important enough to be heard. They don’t realize that this is happening, but it has a detrimental effect on how they view themselves. They start to feel like they aren’t important.
Children start associating this with a parent not loving or caring about them anymore.
Did you know that you may have given a message to your child unintentionally, but now it’s made them feel unloved? That’s okay. You can learn how to encourage your child to have a voice. It will help your child improve their outlook and start to feel they are important to you. Again, a lot of the time, all children want is to feel as if their voice is heard and they are important to their parents.
Once your child feels like you are listening and understanding them, they will feel safer. There is a basic skill that helps with this: reflective listening. If you combine reflective listening with an empathetic response, it results in a new tool to use with your kiddo. These coping skills are connected and essential to improving your relationship with your child.
We’re Here To Help. Begin Working With A Children’s Therapist in San Diego, CA
If you or your child is in need of support, we are here for you! Our team of caring therapists can help you and your child develop the skills necessary to flourish and grow healthy relationships. You can start your therapy journey with Family Connections Therapy by following these steps:
- Request an appointment by completing our form online or calling (858) 776-8804
- Meet with a therapist from our team
- Start understanding your child on a deeper level!
Other Services Offered With Family Connections Therapy
Our team understands you may deal with a variety of mental health concerns. This is why we offer many options to help support your mental health in addition to child counseling. These include individual therapy, family therapy, couples therapy, and reunification therapy. We offer services in person as well as online for your convenience. Some of our specialties include but are not limited to therapy for ADHD, LGBTQIA+, and depression, and our therapists are well-versed in play therapy as well as therapy for attachment and healthy development. Reach out now to learn more about our counseling services or visit our blog today!